Author: petebeck3

Pete Beck III ministered as a pastor and Bible teacher in Burlington for over 35 years. He is married to Martha, with whom he has four children, ten beautiful grandchildren, and five amazing great grandchildren. He ministers in his local church as a Bible teacher and counselor. He has written several books, including two that are available on Amazon - Seeing God's Smile and Promise of the Father - as well as a wide variety of Bible-related articles.

Can We Sin after We Are Born Again?

spirit

Recently I was challenged by a student to respond to his statement that those who are truly born again do not sin. He cited the following verse to uphold his point.

Whoever has been born of God does not sin, for His seed remains in him; and he cannot sin, because he has been born of God. 1 John 3:9 (NKJV)

My answer to his question required me to summarize an important teaching on spirit, soul, and body, which I will do here as well. If you wish to read the more detailed version, click here.

To begin, another passage seems to refute the argument made by the student and shows how important it is to take into account the entire Bible before making a claim.

If we say that we have no sin, we are deceiving ourselves and the truth is not in us. 9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 10 If we say that we have not sinned, we make Him a liar and His word is not in us. 1 John 1:8–10 (NASB95)

Now we have a clear case of two passages which seem to make opposing claims, which requires us to dig deeper to find the solution.

The Bible says that God often conceals his truth, which requires us to search the Word of God while relying upon the guidance and revelation of the Holy Spirit. The Bible cannot be properly understood merely using our mental abilities.

Unless the Spirit of God opens our hearts and minds to his truth, we cannot understand it.

At that time Jesus said, “I praise You, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, that You have hidden these things from the wise and intelligent and have revealed them to infants. 26 “Yes, Father, for this way was well-pleasing in Your sight. Matthew 11:25–26 (NASB95)

Since God does it this way, it effectively “levels the playing field” so that those who are more educated and intelligent have no advantage over a child. We all need the Holy Spirit, or we are lost.

Paul shared the following important passage in his first letter to the church in Thessaloniki, Greece.

Now may the God of peace Himself sanctify you entirely; and may your spirit and soul and body be preserved complete, without blame at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. 24 Faithful is He who calls you, and He also will bring it to pass. 1 Thessalonians 5:23–24 (NASB95)

It is clear from these verses that we are a tripartite being.

Some claim that we only have a soul and body, but if that were the case, why did Paul distinguish between spirit and soul? Likewise, the author of the letter to the Hebrews wrote that the Word of God divides between soul and spirit, thus confirming the distinction.

For the word of God is living and active and sharper than any two-edged sword, and piercing as far as the division of soul and spirit, of both joints and marrow, and able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart. Hebrews 4:12 (NASB95) 

When Adam sinned, his spirit “died” the day he ate the forbidden fruit in the sense that he was cut off from his previous connection with God and his glory. He immediately became aware of his nakedness, guilt, and shame, all of which were unknown to him before. It was only years later that his body succumbed to death. Death began in the spirit of man eventually resulting in the death of the body. The soul, the combination of spirit and body, according to Genesis 2:7, was also damaged beyond repair.

Since death began in the spirit, it is only reasonable that our salvation should begin there.

The first step of our great salvation is the new birth, at which time our spirits, the innermost part of our being, are regenerated and joined unto the Lord.

“That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit. 7 “Do not be amazed that I said to you, ‘You must be born again.’ John 3:6–7 (NASB95)

Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come. 2 Corinthians 5:17 (NASB95)

But he who is joined to the Lord is one spirit with Him. 1 Corinthians 6:17 (NKJV)

When we are born again, we are recreated or made new in the spirit.

It is readily apparent that we do not receive new bodies and our souls (mind, will, and emotions – our personalities) are not changed immediately either. God works from the inside out, making true Christianity completely different from other religions that seek to change us from the outside in, focusing on behavioral change instead of internal transformation. This internal work is done by the Spirit, whether we understand what he did or not, and it is based on our being joined to Christ and benefiting from his death and resurrection. (See my article on justification.) Justification is a once for all past work of God.

The body will not be saved until the resurrection upon Christ’s return. It will be the climax or fulfillment of our salvation, at which time these mortal bodies will be gloriously transformed. It is very much a future event. (See my article on glorification.)

This leaves the soul. God works in our souls in a very different way. Whereas justification and glorification are done to us and for us as once for all events, the salvation of the soul, which is called sanctification or transformation, requires our daily participation. It is an ongoing present work of grace. (See my article on transformation.)

Therefore, having been justified [past tense] by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, 2 through whom also we have obtained our introduction by faith into this grace in which we stand [present transformation]; and we exult in hope of the glory of God [glorification at the future resurrection]. Romans 5:1–2 (NASB95) 

What God does in our spirits is what makes us children of God. The new birth forever alters our identity. We are joined to God in our innermost being. That part of us does not sin.

Paul expressed this glorious truth in the seventh chapter of his letter to the church in Rome.

For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh; for the willing is present in me, but the doing of the good is not. 19 For the good that I want, I do not do, but I practice the very evil that I do not want. 20 But if I am doing the very thing I do not want, I am no longer the one doing it, but sin which dwells in me. Romans 7:18–20 (NASB95)

Unless we understand the dynamic difference between spirit, soul, and body, these words are very strange. But once we do understand, they make perfect sense. Paul identified with his born again spirit, which does not sin. Nevertheless, he committed sin since he had not yet been glorified. There was still a sinful pull away from God generated by the residual connection with the old order of the adamic creation.

Paul was responsible before God for this sin, but it did not define him. His identity was in Christ, not in the flesh.

“I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me. 21 “I do not nullify the grace of God, for if righteousness comes through the Law, then Christ died needlessly.” Galatians 2:20–21 (NASB95)

We all will have this relentless battle in the soul between the regenerated spirit and the adamic “flesh” until our bodies are resurrected.

For the flesh sets its desire against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; for these are in opposition to one another, so that you may not do the things that you please. 18 But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the Law. Galatians 5:17–18 (NASB95)

After the resurrection, our souls will be unified in devotion to God, being the combination of a regenerated spirit and a glorified body. 

The only way for us to experience Christ’s victory while we live in these mortal bodies is to reckon ourselves to be dead to the power of sin and to the condemning power of the law, but alive to the Holy Spirit who indwells us. (Romans 6-8)

So we see that our spirits do not sin, but we do, because we have not yet been fully saved or glorified, which will happen at the resurrection. Until then, we live by faith in the risen Lord, free from condemnation (Romans 8:1 and John 5:24), and completely dependent upon the help of God’s indwelling Spirit.

To read my other articles about the Amazing New Covenant, click here.
Share this post...

Does the Holy Spirit Abandon Us When We Sin?

spirit

Recently I was asked if the Holy Spirit abandons us when we sin. The questioner cited King David’s plea which he made to the Lord following his sin of adultery with Bathsheba and consequent murder of her husband, Uriah. 

Do not cast me away from Your presence And do not take Your Holy Spirit from me. Psalm 51:11 (NASB95)

The logical assumption is that David could lose the presence of the Holy Spirit. The questioner concluded that we, too, can lose the Spirit if we sin. To properly answer this great question, we must compare the nature of the New Covenant to what David experienced under the Old.

The Old Covenant required people to keep God’s Law as given to Moses at Mt. Sinai and in subsequent “downloads” from above. Blessings were attached to obedience, and curses to disobedience.

Because no one is capable of keeping the Law, it always brings a curse or judgment upon those who try.

Paul summed this up in his letter to the Galatians.

For as many as are of the works of the Law are under a curse; for it is written, “CURSED IS EVERYONE WHO DOES NOT ABIDE BY ALL THINGS WRITTEN IN THE BOOK OF THE LAW, TO PERFORM THEM.” Galatians 3:10 (NASB95)

We learn from Paul that God did this to convince us that we are hopelessly lost and desperately need a Savior.

But the Scripture has shut up everyone under sin, so that the promise by faith in Jesus Christ might be given to those who believe. 23 But before faith came, we were kept in custody under the law, being shut up to the faith which was later to be revealed. 24 Therefore the Law has become our tutor to lead us to Christ, so that we may be justified by faith. Galatians 3:22–24 (NASB95)

King David was an extraordinary man who related to God by faith, as did Abraham before him. As a result, they experienced some aspects of the New Covenant, which requires us to connect with God by faith in Christ and his finished work on our behalf. 

The Scripture, foreseeing that God would justify the Gentiles by faith, preached the gospel beforehand to Abraham, saying, “ALL THE NATIONS WILL BE BLESSED IN YOU.” 9 So then those who are of faith are blessed with Abraham, the believer. Galatians 3:8–9 (NASB95)

Before the Law was given to Moses and before God instituted circumcision as a sign of the covenant, God declared that Abraham was justified by his faith in God’s promise.

Even so Abraham BELIEVED GOD, AND IT WAS RECKONED TO HIM AS RIGHTEOUSNESS. Galatians 3:6 (NASB95)

God is not bound by time as we are. Time is a temporary creation which will eventually be abolished. God sees the end from the beginning. (Isaiah 46:10) He can declare that something is done before it ever takes place within our time frame because he has already seen its completion. That is why he says that we are already glorified, even though it is still a future event for us. (Romans 8:30)

Once we see that the New Covenant promise of eternal life in Christ has already been secured, it should change how we think.

Under the Old Covenant, the Holy Spirit was with God’s people, but not in them. The New Covenant changed this radically. 

I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may be with you forever; 17 that is the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it does not see Him or know Him, but you know Him because He abides with you and will be in you. John 14:16–17 (NASB95)

The gift of the indwelling Spirit is permanent. Jesus said that the Spirit will indwell us forever. This is because through the miracle of the New Covenant the Holy Spirit becomes one with our spirit.

But he who is joined to the Lord is one spirit with Him. 1 Corinthians 6:17 (NKJV)

The importance of this cannot be overstated! The Old Covenant depended on our performance in keeping the Law. Therefore, the Old Covenant could not possibly save anyone.

Since no one can ever keep the Law, God instituted the New Covenant which depends entirely on Christ’s keeping it for us.

For Christ is the end [Greek: telos - fulfillment] of the law for righteousness to everyone who believes. Romans 10:4 (NASB95)

Not only did our Lord fulfill the Law on our behalf, he also paid the penalty for our violation of the Law. 

He made Him who knew no sin to be sin on our behalf, so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him. 2 Corinthians 5:21 (NASB95)

To suppose that the Holy Spirit will abandon us if we sin is to fail to comprehend the nature and essence of the New Covenant.

We cannot attain or maintain a right relationship with God. It is by grace from beginning to end. To think otherwise reveals that we have yet to grasp the glorious truth of the gospel. We begin our discipleship journey by faith in Christ’s finished work, and we continue on that faith walk until the very end when we are resurrected from the dead and instantly changed into the glorious state promised to God’s children.

Beloved, now we are children of God, and it has not appeared as yet what we will be. We know that when He appears, we will be like Him, because we will see Him just as He is. 3 And everyone who has this hope fixed on Him purifies himself, just as He is pure. 1 John 3:2–3 (NASB95)

Jesus, the one who will judge us at the end of time, revealed that we have no worries about his condemning us. 

Truly, truly, I say to you, he who hears My word, and believes Him who sent Me, has eternal life, and does not come into judgment, but has passed out of death into life. John 5:24 (NASB95)

Hopefully this will conclude the matter for us, unless we do not take Jesus at his word. But, just in case we need more “proof,” consider Paul’s words.

Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Romans 8:1 (NASB95)

If we properly understand  and believe Romans Chapters six and seven, we will conclude with Paul that we have no worries or fears of ever being condemned. Unfortunately, some who copied the scriptures could not believe that this could possibly be true; so, they appended the phrase “who do not walk according to the flesh but according to the spirit.” However, the earliest manuscripts, which are of greater authority, do not contain this phrase.

Sadly, even devoted Christians have a very difficult time believing that we have no fear of being condemned by God at the judgment. 

There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love. 1 John 4:18 (NASB95)

Many Christians refuse to believe that Christ already took the punishment for our sins. They imagine that somehow we still must attain perfection through our own efforts in order to be pleasing to God. Such thinking reveals that we do not understand justification, whereby Christ gave us his perfect right standing with God. This the very issue that the Galatian church had such a hard time grasping. Paul asked them:

Are you so foolish? Having begun by the Spirit, are you now being perfected by the flesh? Galatians 3:3 (NASB95)

The answer, of course, is that we must walk with God on a daily basis in the same way we began, by faith in what Christ accomplished on our behalf. We live in the Spirit; therefore, we must learn to daily walk in the Spirit by faith.

If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit. Galatians 5:25 (NASB95)

The sure hope of experiencing God’s glory in the resurrection motivates us to cooperate with the daily operation of grace in our lives called sanctification or transformation. After we are born again, God works inside each of his children to transform how we think, speak, and act to bring us into alignment with our new spiritual identity. We experience ups and downs on this discipleship journey, but the end is already guaranteed. God made us more than conquerors, which gives us strength and determination to persevere.

To read my other articles about the Amazing New Covenant, click here.
Share this post...

A Father’s Reward

godly man

Jesus came to restore us to a right relationship with Abba Father, for which obedience to his Father in heaven he received eternal reward.

Being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. 9 For this reason also, God highly exalted Him, and bestowed on Him the name which is above every name, Philippians 2:8–9 (NASB95)

Jesus’ mission was to save and restore us in order to bring his Father glory and honor. By turning our hearts back toward Abba Father, he made it possible for earthly Dads and their children to be in right relationship, too.

Proper relationships between fathers and sons and fathers and daughters is a means to experience tremendous blessings from God. An absent or broken father – child connection opens the door to many negative consequences.

“Look, I am sending you the prophet Elijah before the great and dreadful day of the LORD arrives. 6  His preaching will turn the hearts of fathers to their children, and the hearts of children to their fathers. Otherwise I will come and strike the land with a curse.” Malachi 4:5-6 (NLT)

Much of the trouble we see in our nation and around the world goes back to a break of the relationship between fathers and their children, which ultimately goes back to the absence of a relationship between us and Abba. When we men get our relationship with Abba right, restored relationships with our children can more easily follow.

Fathers who have been reconciled to Abba can help their own children grow up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2  “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), 3  “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.” 4  Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. Ephesians 6:1-4 (ESV)

A father’s joy is seeing his children do well.

Children who dishonor parents because of a broken father-child relationship will not do well in life. It is paramount for us dads to work diligently to repair our relationship with our children, for our sake and theirs, not mention, God’s.

Solomon said that a wise son makes a glad father. (Proverbs 10:1) Conversely, having a foolish son or daughter is a heavy load for any parent to bear. Ultimately, our children must make their own way in life: we cannot pass that test for them. A parent’s role is to give them the love, affirmation, blessings, and other tools they will need to succeed, but all of us must make their own choices.

Perfect parenting does not guarantee perfect results. Neither does poor parenting guarantee that children will fail.

When dads miss the mark, our heavenly Abba can supply what is missing to our children. When dads hurt their children, Abba can bring healing. When parents did their best, but children nevertheless go down a wrong path, Abba can comfort the parents and correct the children. Where we parents realize we failed, there is forgiveness and hope for the future. We do our best, hopefully, but all of us make plenty of mistakes as a parent and as a child.

For those of us who do not have our own natural children, there are lots of opportunities to be a “father” to those who are natural or spiritual orphans.

Adoption is one of the important themes of the Bible. Moses was adopted. So was Jesus. Every born again follower of Christ is God’s child through adoption. For those of us whose children are now grown, we can now invest in however many others God brings our way, who need a fatherly touch.

One day we will receive the reward for our labors, but even now we can rejoice as we watch our proteges learn to successfully navigate life using the skills and blessings we passed on to them.

A father’s reward comes from pouring out his life into his children and watching them succeed and go farther than he ever did.

The blessing continues as we watch our children pass the blessing forward to their own offspring. And when we ultimately stand before God’s throne at the judgment, we will hear him say, “Well done!” Hallelujah!

After all, what gives us hope and joy, and what will be our proud reward and crown as we stand before our Lord Jesus when he returns? It is you! 20  Yes, you are our pride and joy. 1 Thessalonians 2:19-20 (NLT)
Click here to see entire series.
Share this post...

Leaving a Legacy

godly man

Every father will leave a legacy, whether it be good, bad, or indifferent. If we ask him, God will help us to live a life that honors God, inspires those who follow, and generally elevates the family.

A good man leaves an inheritance to his children’s children, And the wealth of the sinner is stored up for the righteous. Proverbs 13:22 (NASB)

The godly walk with integrity; blessed are their children after them. Proverbs 20:7 (NLT)

We may have received a wonderful gift from God-fearing ancestors, or our family may have provided us with much to overcome. In the spirit, every born again person is a brand new creation (2 Corinthians 5:17), but when it comes to the soul (the mind, will, and emotions), each of us starts our personal faith journey at a line set by those who came before us. This is one reason it is quite impossible to properly judge a life. We do not always understand a person’s faith journey starting point.

For example, if my family has a history of verbal abuse and alcoholism, I may have developed a very dysfunctional way of coping with life. In contrast, if my family was loving, communicated well, and encouraged me regularly, I have been handed a healthier way of relating to people and have received other tools for success. This does not mean that the child of the alcoholic cannot do wonderfully in life, nor does it imply that the child from a healthier family will not fail. It merely means to one has a head start over the other, if he or she chooses to use it.

Our families’ pasts influences us, but it need not define our lives or legacy.

Regardless of where we begin our life journey, God wants us to live in such a way that those who follow us will have an easier time of it. We can leave a godly and good legacy for our descendants. This is what I call the generational aspect of salvation. Perhaps we can be the generation that enables our families to break free from sin and bondage that has held us captive for generations!

Knowing a little about our family history may help us to better understand how we can move our family forward in God. My own genealogical research has produced some great information. I found godly men and women in my family tree, about whom I knew nothing previously and from whom I am no doubt a benefactor of their passing down spiritual blessings to me and others. Not surprisingly, I also found the opposite, which helps me to know better how to pray and stand by faith.

Alcoholism was prevalent on both sides of my family tree, but my Dad and Mom responded to God’s grace and made decisions that helped to nullify that generational sin’s power to enslave family members. The same can be said for many other families which have their own heroes who stood against longstanding family bondage and sin, making it far easier for those who follow to walk in freedom.

Over my years as a pastor, I worked with many whose family inheritance was atrocious – everything from criminal activity, abandonment, addiction, violence, and abuse of various kinds.

Men who come from these sorts of families have an obvious disadvantage. Those who attempt to be godly husbands and fathers, without ever having experienced or even seen positive examples at home, are heroes in my book.

When the Allies assaulted the beaches of Normandy on D-Day, many men in the first wave gave their lives to make it possible for those who followed to have safe access to the landing areas. Someone had to make the initial assault, and they were chosen. Those who came later in the day benefited immensely from the sacrifices of their predecessors. Establishing a legacy of godliness can compare to what those brave men did.

If we are making a stand to undo generations of family devastation, it is important for us to realize that we will have to fight a pitched battle for our gains. At the end of our life, what we accomplish on behalf of our families may seem less than what some achieved in their lifetimes. But, we should not compare ourselves to others who may have inherited a far better legacy from their ancestors. We should simply be the best spiritual warrior and legacy builder we can be. The progress we make during our lifetimes will help our children and grandchildren go far beyond anything we may accomplish. That will be our reward. Our sons and daughters will carry the banner forward in their time. That’s how godly legacies are begun and passed down. Of course, all of this can only be accomplished by God’s grace!

We can ask ourselves, “What price am I willing to pay to bless my children and grand children with a godly legacy?”

That is between us and God, but whatever we decide and do will be felt by many, many others over time. Future generations may not know to whom they owe a debt of gratitude, but God knows, and so will we. Whatever the price, I believe it will be worth it.

Here are some of the ways we can develop a godly legacy. It is never too early to start, which is why I listed each stage of life. Spiritually speaking, we may be in the childhood stage, even though we are an adult.

The Childhood Stage – Building Strong Foundations

  • Study God’s Word. Even children can hunger to know more of God’s Word for themselves. When our children were small, we played cassette tapes for them on which characters sang the scriptures. It worked very well to instill the Bible into their hearts.
  • Learn to pray and make it a part of our lives. True humility knows that it cannot do this thing called life without God’s help.
  • Be a worshiper and share our faith with others.
  • Exercise our faith. Don’t merely affirm doctrine. Trust God.
  • Aspire to live in true holiness and purity without becoming legalistic. Devote ourselves to God’s purposes for our lives. If we do not know what they are yet, keep seeking. We can always simply tell Jesus that we are his to direct and command.
  • Be accountable. Find a mentor (our natural father or a godly man) who will disciple and encourage us along the way.
  • Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal more of the Father’s love to us.
  • Be faithful in the small things. Serve those who are in leadership.
  • Be careful to stay properly related to the authority people in our lives.

The Young Man Stage – Exercising Our Spiritual Muscles

  • Find true freedom by believing in the finished work of Christ and by learning to walk in the Spirit.
  • Learn to exercise the authority we have in Christ to share the Gospel, pray for people, engage in spiritual warfare, and respond to faith challenges.
  • Be willing to take on new responsibilities. Let God stretch us by doing things outside our “comfort zones.” Refuse to limit ourselves by what we think we can do. Trust God to help us accomplish his will.
  • Continue to be a man who is under authority while learning to lead.
  • Be faithful in whatever we do.
  • Act as a protector of others.
  • Continue the discipleship journey and begin to disciple others.

The Fatherhood Stage – Building for the Future

  • Transition from primarily focusing on our own lives and goals to helping others discover and fulfill their potential.
  • Invest heavily in the younger generation. 
  • Pass the leadership or ministry baton when appropriate and allow our disciples to try their wings. They may naturally defer to us, which is good, but encourage them to learn to operate as the lead person with you on the sidelines acting as cheerleader and coach. Act as friend, counselor, and supporter in our new role as Dads of adult children.
  • If our own children are grown and have left the nest, we can use our newfound freedom and time to expand our ministry horizons, which can also open up opportunities for those we mentor and lead.
  • Stay connected in accountable relationships.

Concluding Thoughts

Don’t be selfish; don’t live to make a good impression on others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourself. 4 Don’t think only about your own affairs, but be interested in others, too, and what they are doing. Philippians 2:3-4 (NLT)
  • We will not always be in the picture. Let’s make good use of our time.
  • God often saves the best for last.
  • Make it our aim to be faithful in every stage of life.
  • Prepare now to enjoy life and be fruitful in our latter years.
Click here to access all articles in this series.
Share this post...

Fathers Represent Abba to Their Children

godly man

As if accurately modeling Christ’s love to our wives were not daunting enough, fathers are charged to be representatives of Father God to their children, too.

Good fathers provide their children with a first idea of Abba’s character and love.

Jesus perfectly represented his Father to us, and we must do the best we can for our children.

Because of the poor job done by many human fathers, our heavenly Father has a public relations problem. I remember praying with one woman who had experienced terrible things at the hands of an abusive step-father. When she contemplated praying directly to Father God, it scared her. She had a very poor impression of a God who would allow such things to happen to her. That poisonous image of her loving Abba etched in her heart by a man who failed in his charge of properly representing Father God kept her from having a loving relationship with Abba for many years. Thankfully, Jesus set her free from all that, and she eventually came to trust her Abba. Conversely, when a father properly models Father’s heart to his children, it gives them a tremendous advantage.

This is eternal life, that they may know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom You have sent. John 17:3 (NASB95)

Knowing Abba is our ultimate quest and modeling Abba as a good father is perhaps the greatest role available to a man.

Below I have listed some ways we can properly represent Abba to our children. But first, let’s meditate on the following passage from Ephesians.

For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, 15  from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named, 16  that according to the riches of his glory he may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in your inner being, 17  so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith—that you, being rooted and grounded in love, 18  may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, 19  and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God. Ephesians 3:14-19 (ESV)

 

Fathers lavish kindness and love on their children and delight in them.

The “Parable of the Prodigal Son” is a great example. Many think that story should be entitled “The Parable of the Prodigal Father” instead. To be prodigal means to spend lavishly or wastefully. We learn from this parable that…

Fathers are to lavish love and attention on their children, even when they do not respond in kind. In other words, a Father’s love is unconditional.

Abba loved us even when we were his enemies. If we did not receive this kind of love from our own dads, we must ask Abba to teach us how to give away to our children what we did not receive. 

In order to love like this, we must first receive Abba’s love.

One of the worst things we can do is to model to our children the idea that Father God is indifferent and distant from us. We must choose to properly give away a father’s love so that children gain the proper idea that God wants them around and is vitally interested in the details of their lives. Perhaps the proper word to describe all this is “delight.”

One of the great revelations in life is when we find out that Abba actually likes us, as well as loves us.

Children know when they are merely tolerated. When parents show more affection for one child than another, it communicates a rather covert form of rejection. This was true in the case of Joseph and his brothers. Jacob’s obvious preference for Joseph stirred them to jealousy and hatred. It is only natural for a fathers to get along better with some children due to personalities, but we should be careful to do our best to delight in each child. We will not be able to do this for our children if we have not come to understand that Abba delights in us.

We can only give away what we have received.

This puts a burden on every father to seek God for what we need to be for our children.

Abba spoke words of affirmation and delight over his Son.

But even as he spoke, a bright cloud came over them, and a voice from the cloud said, “This is my dearly loved Son, who brings me great joy. Listen to him.” Matthew 17:5 (NLT)

Delight does more to affirm our children than perhaps anything else we can do for them.

Every child hopes and longs for his or her father’s approval. Do not withhold it. The withholding of delight is powerfully negative. Children know the difference between the words, “I love you,” and genuine delight.

Sometimes a father’s love is not returned, at least for a while, if his son or daughter is self-centered and determined to learn life’s lessons the hard way. Abba-like fathers will be there for their children when they finally come to their senses.

Fathers bless their children and provide a secure and safe environment for growth and expression.

Earthly fathers are responsible to provide a safe and secure environment in which their children can grow and thrive.

The LORD is my shepherd; I have all that I need. 2  He lets me rest in green meadows; he leads me beside peaceful streams. Psalm 23:1-2 (NLT)

An important aspect of a father’s protection is shielding his children from undue criticism or rejection. Little children do not have adult abilities to discern what is true and what is mere opinion or a lie. Whatever a father tells his child will be believed when children are young.

If fathers speak words of affirmation and encouragement, it will build the child on the inside. Fathers who tear down their children with negative hurtful words impact those little lives in the wrong direction.

Children need to know they are protected from outside dangers and that the one they trust will never betray them. This is how ABBA is. It is how we fathers must be, too.

Whatever is good and perfect comes down to us from God our Father, who created all the lights in the heavens. He never changes or casts a shifting shadow. James 1:17 (NLT)

Abba is the source of all blessings, and he designed things so that blessings should flow from him through earthly fathers to their families, if everything is working as it should.

If an earthly father is serving the devil, demonic anti-blessings (curses) may be passed down.

Fathers need to realize that they are part of a long relay race coming down through the generations. Every child inherits good and bad things from previous generations of fathers. Good decisions made by previous fathers often provide residual blessings for generations to come. Conversely sins and poor life decisions made by previous generations of fathers can negatively impact children, grandchildren, etc. We are not responsible for the sins of our ancestors, but we may reap some consequences of their sins. This called the law of sowing and reaping. (Galatians 6:7) Only Jesus can set us free from this vicious cycle. (If you want to read more about how this works, click here.)

One of the great things any father can do for his children is consciously and deliberately speak blessings aloud over them.

It may be done at a special blessing event when the child arrives at a milestone in life, such as an 18th birthday. It also can and should be done informally on a continual basis. A father’s blessing carries great weight and goes a long way to insuring success. A father’s “curse,” hurtful words spoken in anger and spite, go into the heart and soul of the child, guaranteeing future problems, unless that child is set free by Jesus.

Good fathers carefully guard their words to their children, knowing that what they say shapes their lives.

Fathers teach their children how to be successful in life.

When children are small, they need love and watchful care. As they mature, they must be prepared for the coming day when they will be thrust into the world as self-governing adults, who will need to provide for their own families. Fathers are charged to teach their children a wide variety of life skills, including a love for the truth, a fear of God, a devotion to Jesus, love for family, loyalty to friends, obedience to authority, and faithfulness in performing responsibilities. Fathers have the ability to intuitively know in what areas each of their children have talent and can gently guide them into appropriate fields of work. Fathers should model how to be a good husband and father and teach their sons and daughters how to select a spouse.

Fathers discipline their children.

For the LORD corrects those he loves, just as a father corrects a child in whom he delights. Proverbs 3:12 (NLT)

Loving fathers discipline their children. The opposite is also true, disinterested fathers fail in this area. Discipline is difficult. It requires loving firmness and consistency. When parents get lazy, they tend to let their children get away with things until things reach a point that the parents get angry and react sometimes inappropriately harshly. Proper discipline is done with love and restraint with the ultimate good of the child in mind. We are preparing children for life, not simply trying to make things easy for ourselves as parents.

Fathers release their children into adulthood.

Godly fathers get more pleasure in seeing their sons and daughters excel than in succeeding themselves.

They are able to hand off the baton and get out of the way as soon as possible and advisable. Fathers want their children to grow up and be able to make wise decisions; so, they provide opportunities to make some choices while they still under their watchful supervision. While children are very small, they must be led with a strong hand, but as they grow older, parents must learn to give them room to develop, mature, and “spread their wings.” We should encourage our children that they are able to survive and thrive in the “adult” world.

If we succeed in adequately representing ABBA to our children and others we may mentor, we lay a foundation for their spiritual and practical growth that is incalculable.

If we misrepresent God in these areas, we can do enormous damage. Where there has been abuse or abandonment, children will need to overcome deeply embedded lies about who Abba is and what his attitude toward them is. Where there has been a failure to protect, children may have difficulty in trusting God. Where there has been criticism, children may fear expressing their true opinions and personalities or even attempting new things.

We dads have enormous shoes to fill, but God’s grace is sufficient.

It may be that you will need significant healing and breakthroughs in accepting God’s love and truth in your own life before you can be an effective father. If that is the case, please do not delay in getting the help you need. There is no sense in passing on our dysfunction to another generation. Perhaps the challenge of being a good father will be just the motivation we need to finally come to know our heavenly Father as he desires. It may well be the greatest thing to ever happen to you.

I am writing to you, fathers, because you know Him who has been from the beginning...  1 John 2:13 (NASB)
Click here to access all articles in this series.
Share this post...

Husbands Represent Christ to Their Wives

godly man

Two significant gender specific roles men may play over a lifetime are husbands and fathers.

Both are weighty and beyond our natural ability requiring us to rely on God’s help. If we get these two roles right, we will be a huge blessing to those we love. If we fail through ignorance, neglect, or sinful rebellion, we will damage those we should be protecting and blessing. First, we will look at how husbands represent Christ to their wives.

The following passage written by Paul to the church in Ephesus is often used to teach husband their responsibilities with regard to their wives.

Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26  that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27  so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 28  In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. Ephesians 5:25-28 (ESV)

Unfortunately, men often focus more on what Paul wrote to wives regarding obeying their husbands, instead of on what God says to us men. Scripture was never meant to be used as a means to nag others into conformity. Rather, God uses it to bring each of us to repentance and obedience in our own right. When men learn to love their wives properly, their wives will be encouraged to lovingly and biblically relate to their husbands.

God has made us husbands responsible to love our wives as Christ loves the church. There could hardly be a more challenging and humbling role.

Jesus called himself the Good Shepherd. Husbands are shepherds to their families, representing the Chief Shepherd in various ways. We husbands are to model Christ to our wives and families in attitude, word, and deed. We will only be able to get this right with the help of God’s Spirit. It is no small thing to be Christ’s representative in the home. We will greatly influence our wives and children either positively or negatively, depending how well we do this.

God charges every husband with the duty to love his wife sacrificially, provide for her, protect, teach, develop her as a person and disciple, and provide godly leadership.

Many young men come into marriage with a very selfish perspective, which is the opposite of Christ. Young men are selfish sexually and in their use of time and money. The wife is often more naturally nurturing and unselfish and can be deeply hurt by her immature self-centered husband over and over again during these early years. Husbands are told to be gentle with their wives. Harshness undermines our role as Christ’s representative.

In the same way, you husbands must give honor to your wives. Treat your wife with understanding as you live together. She may be weaker than you are, but she is your equal partner in God’s gift of new life. Treat her as you should so your prayers will not be hindered. 1 Peter 3:7 (NLT)

God works in men through marriage to make us more other-centered and unselfish.

This is part of our preparation for dynamic fatherhood. Let’s take a look at some specific aspects of our responsibilities as husbands.

Husbands model Christ’s unselfish love through serving.

Shepherds exist to care for the sheep. If you are a man who thinks that your wife and children are supposed to wait on you because you work so hard all day, you do not yet understand Christ’s relationship to the church. Jesus literally sacrificed his life for his church, his bride. He washed his disciples’ feet. He served them in countless ways while at the same time having oversight and authority. Despite clearly understanding his role as Lord, he did not “lord it over” them.

Husbands should view themselves as the family’s chief servant who models Christ.

Sacrificially loving our wives means we put their needs and desires in front of our own, which is not easy for us to do. This means we cannot do everything we want to do as young men. As Jesus put it: we are not here to serve ourselves, but others.

So Jesus called them together and said, “You know that the rulers in this world lord it over their people, and officials flaunt their authority over those under them. 43  But among you it will be different. Whoever wants to be a leader among you must be your servant, 44  and whoever wants to be first among you must be the slave of everyone else. 45  For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Mark 10:42-45 (NLT)

 

Husbands are providers.

As shepherds of their families, an important way that men serve is by providing for them.

Some men feel overwhelmed by this responsibility, but that is only because they have not learned that Abba Father is fully committed to provide for them.

As husbands and fathers grow in their relationship with Abba, it helps them properly represent Christ. In years past, men were expected to be the sole breadwinners. Today the husband and wife often share this burden, and in some cases the wife may be the primary earner. There is nothing inherently wrong with this set up. It may simply reflect the wife’s greater abilities and opportunities. It can go wrong, however, if the husband begins to think less of himself because of his wife’s success, or if the wife begins to despise her husband as a result. Regardless of who makes the most money for the family, the husband can never abdicate his responsibility carry the primary spiritual weight of being the provider. Nor is he allowed to slip into a despondent or passive attitude, thereby thrusting the weight of the role of provider onto the shoulders of his wife.

The LORD is my shepherd; I have all that I need. 2  He lets me rest in green meadows; he leads me beside peaceful streams. Psalm 23:1-2 (NLT)

 

Husbands are protectors of the family.

Shepherds protect their flocks from outside attack and from bullies inside the flock. This protection includes financial, spiritual, relational, and physical aspects.

Husbands are called to be the “point men” who directly confront the enemy and stand in the gap for their families.

A husband who is introverted and less bold should never press his wife to do the hard and and uncomfortable things so he can avoid his responsibilities. Any woman who does this for her husband becomes an enabler. The husband is supposed to take the initiative to ensure that the forces of darkness are kept at bay. He should close all known doors of temptation and demonic oppression through personal repentance, careful watching, and using Christ’s authority appropriately.

Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me. Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me. 5  You prepare a feast for me in the presence of my enemies. You honor me by anointing my head with oil. My cup overflows with blessings. Psalm 23:4-5 (NLT)
Husbands are teachers.

Many adults were never taught the great truths of the Bible or how to do even the simplest things by their parents. Husbands should take the lead in seeking the Lord with their wives and helping them grow in the Lord. We should be humble enough to draw upon whatever knowledge and wisdom our wives possess. Wives may come into the marriage far ahead of us in spiritual matters, but this is no excuse for our not taking responsibility. There is an “anointing” upon the husband to lead and teach. God will help us “catch up” if we are behind.

We cannot allow ourselves to be intimidated in spiritual matters. This puts a responsibility on husbands to study and grow spiritually.

Many men are lazy when it comes to spiritual things and, as a result, have little to offer, which is a great travesty and robs the wife and family of what God would have provided for them.

Husbands are leaders.

Leading does not mean that husbands get their way exclusively or have permission to “lord it over” their wives and children. It does mean that we must seek God and work with our wives to arrive at wise and godly decisions.

Even if a husband delegates some of the decision making to his wife, he is ultimately responsible before God.

Modeling leadership is one of the most effective ways to lead. The husband models what it means to be a servant leader. His wife and children benefit from the way he pours himself out in loving service to them.

He lets me rest in green meadows; he leads me beside peaceful streams. Psalm 23:2 (NLT)
Husbands are developers.

One of the goals of a godly husband is to help his wife become all God intends, thereby enabling her to reach her full potential. Wives were never intended to be passive doormats. They complement their husbands and often have tremendous callings and abilities that need to be developed and flourish. The amazing woman in Proverbs 31 is our model.

Click here to access all articles in this series.
Share this post...

The Copernican Captivity of the Church

flat earth

Any lie we believe brings us into captivity to some degree, and the truth is what sets us free.

So Jesus was saying to those Jews who had believed Him, “If you continue in My word, then you are truly disciples of Mine; 32 and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.” John 8:31–32 (NASB95)

God’s Word of truth in the Bible is our written source and guarantee of freedom. The Holy Spirit, also called the Spirit of truth (John 16:13), is the one who reveals God’s Word to us. This combination of revelation from the Holy Spirit and the infallible written Word has the ability to break the power of Satan’s lies. Since this is true, it is only logical that Satan will always try to separate us from God’s Word and truth in some way or another. Sometimes he contradicts it outright, as he did with Eve in the garden when he told her she would not die because of disobeying God’s command. Other times, especially with those of us who say we are devoted to the scriptures, he is more diabolically clever.

Satan entices us to deny what God plainly says without compromising our integrity by simply reinterpreting the Bible to suit us.

This sinister ploy is how he duped a great percentage of the church into rejecting the literal truth of Genesis Chapter One. 

We dare not underestimate the pull in all of us to be smarter than God.

The Scientific Revolution of the 1600’s was an offshoot of the Renaissance, which was a return to non-biblical classical thinking. One of the driving forces behind this movement was a determination to discover scientific truths without being “hemmed in” by what the Bible teaches. Copernicus said it like this.

copernicus scripture quote 1

In other words, Copernicus judged that believing in the literal truth of Genesis Chapter One and other relevant scriptures now constitutes “wresting” them to suit us. Many, if not most, of us in the church have adopted Copernicus’ position based on theories proposed by modern astrophysics.

Martin Luther, a contemporary of Copernicus, utterly condemned that man’s theories as heresy because he upheld the Reformation ideal of sola scriptura. He considered that the Bible is the ultimate source of truth, even when it comes to science. In the following quote, he refers to Joshua 10:12-13.

luther flat earthJohn Calvin, another contemporary of Copernicus, challenged that man’s authority to negate the scriptures. copernicus quote

 

 

 

 

 

 

What was so clear to these reformers who accepted the authority of Bible has been lost to the modern church when it comes to cosmology.

Today we so firmly accept the heliocentric system that we now demand the Bible to conform to it. We reinterpret Genesis Chapter One to be mere poetry with no scientific accuracy. Is it any wonder that atheist laugh at us.

If a lawyer discovers that a witness is guilty of fabricating a story to make his testimony more palatable, that witness loses all credibility.

If the Bible got creation wrong, why on earth should anyone believe anything else it says?

Since admitting that I believe in the literal accuracy of Genesis, I have been accused of not knowing how to properly read or understand the Bible. I have been teaching the Bible for 54 years, yet suddenly I do not know how to interpret scripture! The author of Genesis believed in its literal accuracy, however. That puts me in pretty good company.

Napoleon Bonaparte is reputed to have said:

cosmologyWhether he actually is the source of this saying or not is insignificant to my point. The statement is true. People believe the most outlandish things if so-called experts tell them it is the truth. This was on display during the Covid crisis.

God created us to believe his Words. Satan takes advantage of our inherent need to believe. He knows that we are relatively simple beings who can be easily duped.

If we do not adhere to the Words of God in the Bible, we will fall for most anything.

When Satan tempted our Lord at the beginning of his public ministry, Jesus always defeated the devil by quoting scripture. This is our most reliable defense. Paul called this weapon the “sword of the Spirit.” (Ephesians 6:17) If we abandon God’s Word as our ultimate source of truth, we will always go into captivity.

The Scientific Revolution duped the church by telling us that the Bible is good for spiritual and moral truth, but not for science, and we believed it!

Not immediately, though, but Satan knows that he doesn’t have to fool everyone right away. He understands that a lie can become firmly entrenched in just one generation. After the initial truth contenders die off, the younger generation, which has been told that the lie is the truth by the “expert” testimony of scientists, is prone to fall for the new way of seeing things. And that is exactly what happened.

For the last five hundred years we have endured the Copernican captivity of the Church. 

Many Bible-believing Christians will fight “tooth and nail” to preserve the heliocentric system while at the same time insisting that they believe the Bible 100%. Both cannot be true at the same time. We cannot destroy the literal truth of Genesis One and maintain the literal truth of the resurrection. It is a logical impossibility. Either both are true, or both can be dismissed. Satan knows this, but many Christians do not.

Atheists understand that if we do not even believe Genesis is true, our testimony of Christ’s resurrection crumbles.

It is time for the church to repent of this duplicity and forsake its worship of the globe, space travel, and the other lies that were spawned from the heliocentric occult religion that denies the existence of the firmament and makes the sun the “super power” of the cosmos instead of the God of the Bible. It is time for the church to cast aside its fear of being called foolish by a world that rejects God’s truth. It is time for the church to reclaim its lost heritage of “Sola Scriptura.” It is way overdue for us to return to believing the literal truth of Genesis Chapter One.

The wise men are put to shame, They are dismayed and caught; Behold, they have rejected the word of the LORD, And what kind of wisdom do they have? Jeremiah 8:9 (NASB95)
Share this post...

Part 3 – Don’t Skip This!

godly man

Before moving forward in our study of men’s gender-based roles, we should not skip the most basic role every born-again child of God has while here on the earth – being a disciple!

Jesus said:

“Come, follow me,” Jesus said, “and I will make you fishers of men.” Matthew 4:19 (NIV)

Being a disciple means we follow Christ in order to learn more about him and become more like him.

I want to know Christ and experience the mighty power that raised him from the dead. I want to suffer with him, sharing in his death, 11 so that one way or another I will experience the resurrection from the dead! Philippians 3:10–11 (NLT)

He is a real person who can be known in the Spirit. We also follow his teachings (the Scripture) and embrace his mission (the Great Commission). The role of being a disciple springs from our eternal core identity as children of God, but it is a temporary role. ln heaven we will know as we are known. At the present, we are learners (disciples).

Jesus’ method of discipleship was a combination of teaching and doing. He modeled the behaviors and ministry skills he wanted his followers to develop and gave them opportunities to learn who to use them. True discipleship must include active ministry, or we only have a Greek-style school that merely provides information.

Being a disciple is not so much about filling our heads with knowledge as it is about developing our relationship with God and putting our faith into practice in ways that will glorify God and impact the people around us.

“Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven. Matthew 5:16 (NASB)

We shine as lights in the world by living out our faith in a loving way, performing love-motivated good deeds in Christ’s name, and by sharing the Good News about our Savior and Lord. Disciples model God’s love in order to help people get past their objections to the message of love, the gospel. Disciples learn to share the gospel effectively, minister in the power of God’s Spirit, and generally love on people. Disciples make a point of going to where the lost and unchurched are, instead of expecting them to come to us at our church m meetings. Disciples value and model Christian hospitality as a means to extend God’s kingdom. Disciples see their neighborhoods as their mission field and invest in the people who live, work, and play around them. Fishers of men develop friends outside the church. How else will we reach them?

When Dads wholeheartedly devote themselves to the pursuit of God’s kingdom, they model for their children what it means to be a Christ follower. When Dad’s include their children in reaching out (fishing for men), it teaches them what is most most important.

I have observed that children of parents who are devoted to Christ in word and deed are more likely to adopt kingdom values and commitments than the children of nominal believers.

This is not rocket science. Kids notice what their parents love and serve, and, if there is love and respect, they will imitate them. What we do is more important than what we say, because kids see through shallowness and hypocrisy in adults who only pay God lip service. They will likely reject our words, if our lifestyle does not back them up.

We Dads cannot afford to be passive or lukewarm with regard to Christ, the gospel, discipleship, and mission.

There is much more at stake than our own eternal reward. We must think generationally and realize that how we live will impact generations to come.

Most parents feel the tension between being on mission and raising a family. The solution is to include the family when we are doing missional activities We can include them when you have friends and neighbors over. We can take them when we go on any kind of outreach, including visiting neighbors. Children have a way of disarming people and opening hearts in ways that adults cannot.

We can model what we hope to see develop in our children.

It is possible to figure out ways to include unreached people in our family meals, events, and celebrations. It is wonderful for our children to watch us share the gospel and pray for people. We can include them when we do acts of kindness for neighbors and friends.

Our children are our most important disciples. If we fail with them, our other successes will be rather hollow.

We can only give away what we have. If we give ourselves to being a disciple, we can hope to see the same develop in our children. I encourage us all to prioritize being a disciple, or we sabotage everything else.

Click here to see entire series.
Share this post...

Embracing Our God-given Roles

godly man

In this life God has provided us with roles to play, some voluntary and others imposed.

All the world’s a stage,
And all the men and women merely players;
They have their exits and their entrances,
And one man in his time plays many parts,
(Shakespeare,  As You Like It)

We enter the world as dependent babies and may exit as dependent old folks. In between we might play many different roles. Most of us, at least traditionally, become either husbands or wives and mothers or fathers. Some of us may become bosses at work. More will become employees. Some will become military leaders, and others, soldiers under command. Some will become political leaders, perhaps a president, governor, senator, or congressman or congresswoman. Most of us will be citizens who have the privilege and responsibility of voting them in and out. All of us who live long enough will play the role of baby, child, student, teenager, young adult, and middle-aged adult. Many of us will eventually become seasoned citizens and grandparents, maybe even great grandparents!. Our roles in life come and go. They are all important, but none of them completely define us.

The role that comes closest in our natural lives to defining us as persons revolves around whose child we are. We inherit a great deal from our parents that goes into forming our personalities. 

The only truly defining role in all of life, that, sadly, not everyone gets to experience, is “child of God.” From being God’s child we derive our core identity, which is an eternal reality. It is our greatest privilege and carries with it enormous responsibilities.

Born-again believers are first, foremost, and always God’s children. That will never change. 

The slave does not remain in the house forever; the son does remain forever. John 8:35 (NASB95)

In fact, all born again followers of Christ can rightly claim to be “sons,” the whole lot of us – men, women, and children. This is because we find our true identity in Christ, and our relationship with Abba Father derives from Jesus’ relationship. He is the Son, and we are in Him; therefore, we are all sons, too.

Everyone’s proper and intended core identity is being God’s son.

See how very much our heavenly Father loves us, for he allows us to be called his children, and we really are! But the people who belong to this world don’t know God, so they don’t understand that we are his children. 1 John 3:1 (NLT)

Because you are sons, God has sent forth the Spirit of His Son into our hearts, crying, “Abba! Father!”  Galatians 4:6 (NASB)

Building out from this core identity, God gives us various roles to play over a lifetime. We must be careful not to let any of these other temporary roles interfere with our understanding of who we are at the core. Yet, at the same time, these temporary roles are very important. How we fulfill them can affect our eternal reward.

We have already established in the first article in this series that in Christ, that is in the present spiritual and future resurrection reality, there is neither male nor female. Nevertheless, in this physical life on earth, first and foremost our roles derive from our gender. When a baby arrives in this world, or now when we get the ultrasound results, the key question is whether “it” is a boy or a girl. Then we can accurately label “it” a “he” or “she.” The idea that gender is fluid and can be chosen at a later date is absurd. Gender is established by God and permeates our entire being down to the chromosomal level.

We all experience life through the filter of our gender.

No one can fully know what it is like to live as a member of the opposite sex, regardless of claims to the contrary. Infusions of sex hormones and surgeries may indeed alter some things, but our chromosomes cannot be changed. Gender is assigned by God and is a determining factor in our life experience.

A wise person embraces God’s gender choice for him or her.

Over a lifetime, we play many different roles, some which are gender-based and some which are not. We begin as children whose main responsibility is to obey our parents. Next we move into adolescence, when we begin to think more like and adult and take on some adult responsibilities and privileges, in addition to experiencing adult temptations. Adulthood provides us with many role options – husband, father, wife, mother, breadwinner, boss, employee, leader, follower, disciple, mentor, etc. But none of these roles change our core identity.

Each role carries its own responsibilities, privileges, and rewards. Each of us should attempt to excel at the roles God allows us to play in life. None are insignificant or unimportant to God.

One huge problem with role playing is if we start to think that our roles define us. When those “under” authority start thinking that those “over” them are superior to them, it strikes a blow at our true identity. Unfortunately, those in authority often see themselves as actually being superior and communicate that directly or indirectly to those they oversee, thus denigrating and diminishing the perceived worth of those people. This is a serious violation of the authority role. Those in authority have the responsibility to serve and build up those under their care, as well as lead them. 

But it is not this way with you, but the one who is the greatest among you must become like the youngest, and the leader like the servant. Luke 22:26 (NASB95)

Since I am a man and understand masculine roles more than feminine ones, that is the focus of this series. Women cannot experience or partake of the roles God gives to men that are gender-based, just as women have roles that cannot be experienced by men.

Two unique potential male roles are being a husband and a father. Each of these has specific responsibilities, privileges, and rewards.

These roles, when properly carried out, constitute a very high calling, just as being a wife and mother do. I hope this series will help you to gain a greater appreciation for manhood and inspire men with a determination to be faithful with what God has placed in our hands. Husband and fathers are given the role and responsibility of being the loving “head” of the wife and family, respectively. Wives and children are assigned the role of being “under” the benevolent headship or authority of the husband or father.

It takes faith and humility to properly function in all of these roles.

As is obvious to most women, there may be nothing inherent in the man that makes him better qualified than the wife to be the head of the family. Sometimes wives have more wisdom, discerning, and natural leadership ability than the husband God has placed over them. Unless the husband, in such cases, operates in his headship with humility, wisdom, and grace, he may make it extremely difficult and unlikely that his wife will submit properly to him. Unless the wife understands her role and identity properly, she may find it next to impossible to follow the husband God has put in her life. We all must see that God is at work in all of these things and is bigger than we imagine.

It requires tremendous faith to be the head of a family or other organization or group, but perhaps it takes even more faith to be a follower.

Husbands and fathers, especially those who are aware of their own deficiencies, may be reluctant to lead, but they must do so nevertheless. Failing to lead betrays our calling and the grace supplied to us by God. So, whether we are gifted leaders or reluctant ones, it is vital that we humbly accept the roles God gives to us. Our humility as leaders and heads can make it possible for others to develop fully under our care.

Click here to access all articles in this series.
Share this post...

Roles, Responsibilities, and Privileges Given to Men – Summary

godly man

God has given unique roles, responsibilities, and privileges to men. Each of us were born into this world with significant choices having been made for us. For example, none of us chose to be born. Our gender was not our own decision. Neither was our physical, intellectual, or personality makeup. We did not choose to which family we would belong, in what part of the world to be born, or what skin color to have. We were not given the option of being poor or wealthy. We were not given the option of being born into a two-parent family, a single parent family, or being an orphan. We did not get to select whether the nation in which we were born was free or oppressed, at peace or at war, impoverished or flourishing. Who made those choices? Since God is sovereign, the obvious answer is the Lord, at least indirectly. Some of these situations are a result of sin and injustice in the world.

The big takeaway is that  we have the option of being reconciled to our lot in life or resenting and fighting against it.

Adam and Eve chose to rebel against how God created them to be dependent beings who don’t know everything and who must rely on God’s help. Satan, who had already thrown aside God’s creation order for himself, deceived Adam and Eve into falling for the lie that God did not have their best interests in mind. They thought that being able to decide how to live for themselves was far superior to trusting and obeying God. By casting off their dependence on God, they thrust the entire human race into darkness and destruction, the consistent result of sin. This mindset has been passed down through the ages to every single person born from Adam’s and Eve’s line.

It is the nature of sin to distrust God and seek to run our lives independently from him.

Jesus became a man, embracing his role as the Lamb of God who provided us with forgiveness for our rebellion and offered to us rebellion’s antitoxin – complete surrender to our loving God. All this was to put humanity and the cosmos back on the right track. This brings us to my first big point.

No one can be truly and thoroughly happy until he or she repents from thinking and living independently from God and surrenders to Christ’s lordship in every area of life.

Gender and Godliness

The new birth makes us all “sons” of God because the Holy Spirit, the Spirit of the Son, comes to live inside us, crying out “Abba” Father. Spiritually speaking, we are all sons of God.

Because you are sons, God has sent forth the Spirit of His Son into our hearts, crying, “Abba! Father!” 7 Therefore you are no longer a slave, but a son; and if a son, then an heir through God. Galatians 4:6–7 (NASB95)

Paul went so far as to say that, in this new birth spiritual reality, there is neither male nor female.

There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free man, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus. Galatians 3:28 (NASB)

Jesus also taught us that in the future resurrection, there will be no marriage, indicating that gender will not be relevant, which agrees with the previous passage in Galatians.

"For in the resurrection they neither marry nor are given in marriage, but are like angels in heaven. Matthew 22:30 (NASB)

But what about now? Clearly in the present situation in which we find ourselves, gender is of great significance. Our physical and soulical makeup is vastly different depending on whether we are male of female. The way we view and experience life differs as well. The roles we play in the reproductive process are very dissimilar. Only males can be husbands and fathers, and only females can be wives and mothers. This is by God’s design.

Even though spiritually men and women are the same, we must embrace the gender-based roles given to us by God in our present historical situation as we await the resurrection, if we are going to fully glorify God.

Roles Given Specifically to Men

A role, like a part in a play, does not fundamentally define who we are. It merely gives us parameters or boundaries for living. We might think of it as a test of our obedience to God’s choice for us.

As believers, we are truly defined by our identity in Christ as children of God. At the identity level there is no distinction based on gender, race, age, nationality, politics, social status, or wealth. However, in the historical time-bound world in which we all presently live, we are given roles to play. Over a lifetime, these roles may change. We first play the role of a child. Later, if we live long enough, we become adults. Within the adult world there are many roles we may play: boss, worker, leader, follower, husband, wife, father, mother, grandmother, etc. A boss is not superior to his workers, but he does have authority and deserves honor based on his role.

Being able to distinguish between identity and role helps us to properly play our role as unto the Lord. Properly serving based on the roles we have in this life is part of what it means to be godly in this present age.

Disciples

The first role every man or woman of God needs to embrace is that of a disciple.

Until we surrender to Christ and become his follower or disciple, we will not be successful at properly functioning in the other roles available to us.

Allowing God’s Spirit to transform our thinking and behavior enables us to live as God intends.

Husbands

A very important gender-based role that most men will be able to play during their lives on earth is that of a husband. Only men can be husbands, if we accept the biblical and true definition and understanding of the word. What does it mean to be a husband? Paul gives us insight in the fifth chapter of Ephesians.

Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23  For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. 24  But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything. 25  Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, 26  so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27  that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless. 28  So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; Ephesians 5:22-28 (NASB)

Let’s focus on two aspects of what it means to be a husband that are found in this passage.

First of all to be a husband means to be “head” of the wife and family. Secondly, husbands are to pour themselves out in love and service for those under their care.

Headship refers to the authority and leadership associated with the responsibility of being a husband. In God’s kingdom, the more responsible we are, the more authority we are given. Otherwise, being the head would be an exercise in frustration. Conversely, God does not give authority simply for its own sake or to be used selfishly.

Authority and responsibility go together. Husbands have authority from God to lead their wives, provide for them, nurture and develop them, and protect them.

In no way does this infer that the husband is superior to the wife. Quite the opposite, as Jesus pointed out, the lesser serves the greater. 

For who is greater, the one who reclines at the table or the one who serves? Is it not the one who reclines at the table? But I am among you as the one who serves. Luke 22:27 (NASB95)

Even though the husband has authority as the head, he is the chief servant in the family.

This is how it works in God’s kingdom. Husbands are commissioned to lay down their lives in loving service to their wives and family, even as Christ laid down his life for the church. This brings us to an important insight about husbands.

Husbands have the unique privilege and responsibility to represent Christ to their wives.

It is hard to imagine a nobler or more challenging role in life than that! We need God’s help to do this, obviously. Most men are inherently selfish and self-centered. Marriage is designed to deliver us from this sinful orientation as we learn to properly love and serve.

When husbands properly model Christ to their wives, it is a way we indirectly preach the gospel. By demonstrating Christ’s selfless love toward our wives and families, people outside the faith get some understanding of Christ, especially when wives return the favor by loving and respecting their husbands.

Children of such a marriage are greatly impacted and will carry into adult life a positive image of marriage. When the wife reciprocates by loving, honoring, respecting, partnering with, and following her husband’s leadership, family life will become heavenly.

Each spouse must choose to focus on what Christ has commanded him or her.

Husbands should focus on loving and serving their spouses, and wives, on loving and respecting their husbands. It is usually a mistake to focus on what our spouse is supposed to do, especially if we try to nag them into doing their part. We can trust the Spirit to work in our partners, if we do our part.

Fathers

Fatherhood is usually the natural outcome of marriage, if our reproductive systems are functioning properly and we cooperate in the process. If we cannot have biological children, we usually have the option to adopt. As challenging as marriage is, fatherhood may be even more so.

Our heavenly father is the source of life itself. Paul wrote:

For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, 15  from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name, Ephesians 3:14-15 (NASB)

In the human realm, God allows fathers to become the source of life for their children. Likewise, all blessings flow from Abba to us.

Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow. James 1:17 (NASB)

Father God desires for human fathers to be conduits of blessings from God to their families.

God’s goodness is past human comprehension. Jesus had to become a human being in order to reveal to us by his words and example what Abba is like. We can only understand God’s nature by observing his Son. In a similar yet lesser way, children gain their first understanding of Abba through their human Dad.

Fathers represent Abba Father to their children.

How we fulfill this responsibility has an enormous impact on our children. If we are present in their lives in a loving and affirming way, it gives our children an enormous head start in life. If we fail our children by being absent or by actually harming them, we undercut their ability to know and trust their Father in heaven.

Some of the ways that Dad’s are commissioned to properly represent Abba are as follows.

  • Fathers should lavish love, delight, and affirmation on their children. This includes speaking blessings over them. Blessings release grace into their lives. Words have the ability to build up or tear down. Fathers’ words have extraordinary impact.
But even as he spoke, a bright cloud came over them, and a voice from the cloud said, “This is my dearly loved Son, who brings me great joy. Listen to him.” Matthew 17:5 (NLT) 

Death and life are in the power of the tongue, And those who love it will eat its fruit.Proverbs 18:21 (NASB)
  • Fathers should provide a safe and secure environment for development and growth.
Your wife shall be like a fruitful vine Within your house, Your children like olive plants Around your table. Psalm 128:3 (NASB)
  • Fathers discipline their children in order to form them into God-fearing responsible adults.
He who withholds his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him diligently. Proverbs 13:24 (NASB)
  • Fathers teach their children the values and skills necessary to be successful in life. This includes spiritual, social, and practical things.
  • Fathers release their children into adulthood gradually at first and completely when they are ready. The goal of fatherhood is to produce responsible adults who will duplicate the discipleship process in their own children. Godly fathers get more pleasure in seeing their sons and daughters excel than in succeeding themselves.

Leaving a Legacy

A good man leaves an inheritance to his children’s children, And the wealth of the sinner is stored up for the righteous. Proverbs 13:22 (NASB)

Whether we intend it or not, each of us will leave a legacy to those who follow.

It will be either a blessing or something to be overcome. While we are alive, we are able to choose which sort we will leave behind at our deaths.

No matter where we may begin our journey in life, we have the opportunity to move forward in God. Those who were born into unkind circumstances or inherited a poor legacy from their forefathers have a starting line for their race that is behind where those with a good inheritance may begin. God does not compare us one against the other, and neither should we. The important thing is that we move our family legacy forward.

The Allied soldiers who stormed the beaches of Normandy on D-Day laid a foundation for those who followed at great expense to themselves. Perhaps we find ourselves in a similar situation regarding our family. If our family has a long history of abuse, addiction, crime, abandonment, or other forms of sin and destruction, it will be very challenging for us to break free from that cycle in order to provide a better starting place for our children, but it will be worth it.

Salvation is generational in that each generation builds on what the previous ones provided for them.

I encourage you fathers to make the decision to build a lasting legacy for succeeding generations. Though future sons and daughters may not fully appreciate what you do for the future, God sees and will reward you.

A Father’s Reward

Jesus came to restore us to a right relationship with Abba Father. He did this to bring his Father glory and honor and us enduring joy.

By turning our hearts back toward Abba Father, he made it possible for earthly Dads and their children to be in right relationship, too.

When a proper relationship exists between father and son or father and daughter, it is a source of great blessing. The absence of the father – child connection opens the door to many negative consequences.

“Look, I am sending you the prophet Elijah before the great and dreadful day of the LORD arrives. 6  His preaching will turn the hearts of fathers to their children, and the hearts of children to their fathers. Otherwise I will come and strike the land with a curse.” Malachi 4:5-6 (NLT)

Much of the trouble we see in our nation and around the world originated in the break of the relationship between fathers and their children, which ultimately goes back to a broken or damaged relationship between human dads and Abba. When we get the Abba-human dad relationship right, the other can more easily follow.

Fathers who have been reconciled to Abba can help their own children grow up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2  “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), 3  “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.” 4  Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. Ephesians 6:1-4 (ESV)

A father’s joy is seeing his children do well.

Solomon said that a wise son makes a glad father. (Proverbs 10:1) Conversely, having a fool for a son or daughter is a heavy load for any parent to bear. Ultimately, our children must make their own way in life. A parent’s role is to give them the love, affirmation, blessings, and other tools they will need to succeed, but children must make their own choices.

Perfect parenting does not guarantee perfect results. Neither does poor parenting guarantee that children will fail.

Where human dads miss the mark, our heavenly Abba can supply what is missing. Where dads hurt their children, Abba can bring healing. Where parents do a good job, but kids nevertheless go down a wrong path, Abba can bring comfort to the parents and correction to the children. If parents realize they failed their children, there is forgiveness and hope for the future. We do our best, hopefully, but all of us make plenty of mistakes as a parent and as a child, even when we try to do it right.

For those of us who do not have our own natural children, there are lots of opportunities to be a “father” to those who are natural or spiritual orphans.

Adoption is a very important theme in the Bible. Moses was adopted. So was Jesus. Every born again follower of Christ is God’s child through adoption. For those of us whose children are now grown, we can now invest in however many others God brings our way who need a fatherly touch.

One day we will receive a reward for our labors, but even now we can rejoice as we watch our proteges successfully navigate life using the skills and blessings we passed on to them.

A father’s reward comes from pouring out his life into his children and watching them succeed and go even farther than he ever did.

The blessing continues as we watch our children pass the blessing forward to their own offspring. And when we ultimately stand before God’s throne at the judgment, we will hear him say, “Well done!” Hallelujah!

After all, what gives us hope and joy, and what will be our proud reward and crown as we stand before our Lord Jesus when he returns? It is you! 20  Yes, you are our pride and joy. 1 Thessalonians 2:19-20 (NLT)
Click here to see entire series.
Share this post...
Share this post...